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I'm often awake at this time of the morning. Not a shift worker, just kinda always wake up. The silence at this hour is comforting, but also allows thoughts through. So I get up, grab a water, look outside, download my thoughts and go back to bed. My first grandchild was born on the 1st July 2021, and I retired from work on the 2nd July 2021, thinking that retirement for me will be making lots of trips to see bub and help my daughter navigate early motherhood. Not to be, was given the opportunity to see Sophia just once, she's now 12 weeks old, and whilst I can see the light at the end of the tunnel somehow I find it hard to be excited about it. I am hoping that this isn't a revolving door and we can find a way forward and out into a new way of life.